Growing old is so underrated! We spend so much time worshipping youth and I wonder why because I love growing old. Yes it has its challenges, but so does being young. I've always sort of been that person that likes the age I'm in at each moment. Yes I get nostalgic about the carefreeness and lack of responsibility that I now lack, but certainly not to the extent of wishing I was younger. Maybe when I hit my 30s I will feel differently.
The best part of growing old for me, other than the fact that I truly didn't think I would live this long, is introspection. I'm a lot more self aware and the older I get, the happier I am with who I'm becoming. I know what I like, and I know what I do not like, although some things swing in between both quite rapidly!
So here are 28 things I've learnt/reinforced over the last year about myself and life in general:
- My mother is my greatest gift. She's my friend, cheerleader, biggest fan, motivator, health, financial, fashion and life adviser. I talk to her everyday and find that I'm becoming a better person by listening to her. Mothers really do know best.
- I've finally discovered my passion. I always thought it was writing, which I still love, but it requires more self-motivation than I can garner consistently. Working with SCAF, raising awareness about sickle cell and helping SC warriors gives me purpose in life.
- I'm consistent in my inconsistency.
- I've learnt that people can carry their insecurities for so long that it permanently alters their personality. Accepting this is the key to loving the most flawed people. It's helped me love my dad more.
- It's so important to let people grow and fight their own battles in life. No matter what decisions you hope people will take, don't encourage them to take them based on your preferences or principles. Just support them in theirs. Air your reservations no doubt, but aim to be their cheerleader and not their coach. I've learned this watching my brothers grow into men.
- Check in on old friends. The ones you used to be 5 and 6 with but now lives on the other side of the world or who lives in the same town but you are both too busy "adulting". Send a message or heck give them a call. Yes a 10 minute call won't kill you. And you might just make their day or vice versa.
- Your body is the vehicle of your life. Take care of yourself because at this age, no one else (except mother maybe) can care for you as well. Take care of your health, hair, skin, teeth etc Stay active and eat well.
- No person is all bad. I try not to focus on others' flaws. Good people are capable of bad things and bad people are capable of wonderful things.
- Ask a lot of questions. I learn so much from listening. Anything I'm saying, I already know, so listening is learning.
- Travelling/Exploring is the best way to broaden your mind. Moving to Lagos has taught me so much, I cannot even begin to quantify.
- Adapt. Feel free to moan about change like we all do, but adapt quickly. Best way to thrive. One day you're driving a new car, next day you don't have a car at all. Getting fired last year taught me alot about how important it is to adapt gracefully to every situation you're handed.
- Drink lots of water.
- Twitter is for disgruntled, intelligent, animated and disillusioned people like myself and I love it!
- The best part about having money is the freedom it brings. Being broke leaves you with no choice, you always go with the smallest, slowest and cheapest option.
- But there's no amount of money that can buy you peace of mind and happiness. I learnt that from my old boss.
- You never get over loosing someone you love. You just live with it but that part of your heart is permanently broken. I still miss my sister everyday.
- People can change. They just have to want to bad enough. And some cheerleading helps.
- People can also change for the worse. But never sit around for someone to change. It's the most frustrating thing.
- I love music, movies and art.
- And I love food! A lot!
- I'm learning to enjoy my own company. I'm still learning though. I much prefer being with people a lot more than I like being alone. With this I'm also learning to be self reliant.
- It's good to talk to God about little things too. Not just job and health issues but like 'God, I hope that Mango jacket goes on Sale'. Mum taught me that nothing is too small to ask direction for.
- Sleep is essential. Watching two of my friends struggle with various types of insomnia has opened my eyes to how easy it is to take for granted something someone else is so desperately praying for.
- Loving someone is the easy part. Staying committed is the difficult bit. Fighting the flight instinct is something I struggle with because I have a restless spirit.
- Patience pays off sometimes. Patience doesn't pay off other times. Telling when to go from the first to the second, or vice versa in my case, is something I'm still learning.
- My maternal instincts are starting to kick in! Never thought the day would come when I would say I'm looking forward to having my own kids. Can't wait to ridicule them with silly outfits and forced dancing purely for my entertainment!
- I'm also not averse to settling down with one man anymore. I like my man now so hopefully I don't give up.
- Stay away from things that bring you negative energy or the ugly sides of you. I left Instagram last year because I found it was making me envious of peoples' real or imagined successes, holidays, promotions, marriage, babies etc! I've never been an envious person and since this was bringing it out of me, I ran. Do the same in every aspect of your life. Only ++++++++ surround me!
Looking forward to next year Insha Allah so I can hopefully have learned/reinforced 29 more things!
xoxo
Miss B!
